I’ve lost myself in this hot sick sweat,

allowed myself to be devoured– dinner for the dark.

Night after night, offering myself as sacrifice…

paralyzed in Hades persistence, his shadow ever-present.

And yet, in this desperate fever-pitch, I notice a glimmer from the tiny flecks embedded within the black velvet of his robe.

And while I cannot bear to look upon him, I can study these shimmering specks in this sea of dark.

I can adopt them as my very own golden girls,

name them each so we can all yell out from our respective boats, sing one another’s soothing song.

I can study how the light flickers and finds its way from that dark shadow-dance into these unexpected spaces, piercing the impenetrable hollows.

I can close my eyes and recall that same golden-white wave as it fell on the bridge of my nose and the whole of my belly once before.

I can remember being held in its womb, infinitely cradled in its warmth,

for a moment hovering safely above the endless velvet sea.